1. Be assertive – not
aggressive or passive. My assertion definition is simple: "Say what
you mean, mean what you say, and don't be mean when you say it." Let this
rule guide your conversations with all visitors, and you will always be
confident, cool, and in control, and you'll always be professional.
2. Speak more slowly.
You'll be amazed at how much more clearly you can think and how much control
and confidence you’ll experience when you consciously slow down your rate of
speech. Speak slowly and methodically when your emotional triggers are
launched, and you'll maintain poise during a difficult conversation.
3. Wait 1-2 seconds
before responding. Responding immediately to demanding or tactical visitors
could result in you saying something you'll later regret. Before you answer,
take a deep breath, wait at least 2 seconds, and think about the best response
and the best approach.
4. Take a time-out.
When you sense that your buttons have been pushed, take a break. You can tell
the visitor that you need to put him on hold while you go get the nurse or
whatever excuse sounds good at the time. The point is to get away from the situation
for a few seconds so you can re-group.
5. Use positive
self-talk. I'm going to sound like Dr. Phil on this one, but I'm quite
serious. Instead of saying to yourself, "I don't get paid enough to put up
with this shit." Say something more positive like, "This guy needs my
help." Thinking more positively helps you respond more positively and
professionally. Negative thoughts lead to negative words, and it spirals into an
extremely hostile situation.
6. Show your power
before you use it. Often, a subtle suggestion of your "power" is
far more effective than the outright use of your power. But, believe it or not,
you are far more "powerful" if you say, "I want to help you, but
when you yell and cut me off, you make it difficult for me to work with
you." This statement demonstrates your power, and your message most
definitely gets across.
These straightforward
tips will position you to keep your cool when situations get hot!
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